"Is it something we invented or is it something in our nature?"
"Do we choose who we love or is it chosen for us?"
"There are different kinds of love or love is just love?"
"Is love measurable or it's all the same?"
I'm still looking for the right answers, I managed to answer them for now but they keep changing as I grow up.
So here is the answer to my 1st question " Is it something we invented or is it in our nature? "
I believe we were born with the ability to love, as we love our parents blindly soon after we are born. We need and depend on them and for that we love them, but then as we grow month after month we start to see uncles and aunts and we love them too, and the same applies to sisters or brothers. We just get on with the loving because we have this very pure heart as children that gives us the ability to love unconditionally.
Once we started to disagree with any of the ones in our lives, we started to doubt how much we love them and how much they love us. Fights begin and arguments emerge in our daily life, and the little pure heart of ours gets contaminated. The idea of love is not the same now, we decide to love a person after we get to know them, then like them and start to share memories with them. It doesn't come as easy as it used to be when we were children.
Now let's move on to the next one " Do we choose who we love or is it chosen for us? " As I said earlier, in the beginning, it is chosen for us but, later on, we kind of decide who we love. First we like someone, be it a friend or a lover, it doesn't matter; as it all starts with us liking a person, assess this person, discover the things we have in common and so on. After we found that we like him/her, we make the effort to get closer and know him/her even better so that if we found that we really really like this person we spend time together, we create memories together so we make more effort to keep this relationship until we realize that we don't just like this person; we love this person.
As for the last two "There are different kinds of love or love is just love? Is love measurable or it's all the same? " I personally think that yes, there are different kinds of love, and yes love is measurable; we just don't have the tool to measure it. No way the love for your mother is the same as the love for your best friends or that the love for your father is the same as the love for your husband/boyfriend. Of course, we love them all but I believe each have a special kind of love, what we are willing to do for each person varies. I always heard this strange example that if two people you love are drowning and you can only save one, the one you choose to save; is the one you love more. It is an uncanny example I agree, but it is kind of logical. I wouldn't dare imagine myself in this situation because I know that what I think now that I'm going to do, is probably not what I will end up doing.
What I'm trying to say is, the heart works in mysterious ways. Who you love now can become a complete stranger in a month, and someone you thought you can never love will end up being the love of your life. It happened to all of us, a best friend from school is now just an acquaintance or a boyfriend/girlfriend is now someone you know nothing about.So be careful, it's not necessarily the other person's fault, it could be yours.
Let me tell you a quick story about my grandmother. The last time I went to visit her, we were sitting in the kitchen preparing food and talking, then I found myself telling her: " Nannah, I love you "so she looked at me in such an astonishment that made me realize that the last time I told her I loved her was probably when I was a kid. She gave me a very strong hug from which I understood how happy she was, and it made me feel guilty that I only told her that I loved her after moving to a different country and not seeing her every week like I used to.
I know for some people- myself included- it can be hard to express our feelings, I have no idea why we have such difficulty talking about how we feel, but that's just something that we will have to work on, so please be careful of how you treat your loved ones so that you won't have a shred of regret when they are no longer in your life.Tell them how much you love them and how much they mean to you, not a daily basis of course but when you feel that they need to hear it.
Once we started to disagree with any of the ones in our lives, we started to doubt how much we love them and how much they love us. Fights begin and arguments emerge in our daily life, and the little pure heart of ours gets contaminated. The idea of love is not the same now, we decide to love a person after we get to know them, then like them and start to share memories with them. It doesn't come as easy as it used to be when we were children.
Now let's move on to the next one " Do we choose who we love or is it chosen for us? " As I said earlier, in the beginning, it is chosen for us but, later on, we kind of decide who we love. First we like someone, be it a friend or a lover, it doesn't matter; as it all starts with us liking a person, assess this person, discover the things we have in common and so on. After we found that we like him/her, we make the effort to get closer and know him/her even better so that if we found that we really really like this person we spend time together, we create memories together so we make more effort to keep this relationship until we realize that we don't just like this person; we love this person.
As for the last two "There are different kinds of love or love is just love? Is love measurable or it's all the same? " I personally think that yes, there are different kinds of love, and yes love is measurable; we just don't have the tool to measure it. No way the love for your mother is the same as the love for your best friends or that the love for your father is the same as the love for your husband/boyfriend. Of course, we love them all but I believe each have a special kind of love, what we are willing to do for each person varies. I always heard this strange example that if two people you love are drowning and you can only save one, the one you choose to save; is the one you love more. It is an uncanny example I agree, but it is kind of logical. I wouldn't dare imagine myself in this situation because I know that what I think now that I'm going to do, is probably not what I will end up doing.
What I'm trying to say is, the heart works in mysterious ways. Who you love now can become a complete stranger in a month, and someone you thought you can never love will end up being the love of your life. It happened to all of us, a best friend from school is now just an acquaintance or a boyfriend/girlfriend is now someone you know nothing about.So be careful, it's not necessarily the other person's fault, it could be yours.
Let me tell you a quick story about my grandmother. The last time I went to visit her, we were sitting in the kitchen preparing food and talking, then I found myself telling her: " Nannah, I love you "so she looked at me in such an astonishment that made me realize that the last time I told her I loved her was probably when I was a kid. She gave me a very strong hug from which I understood how happy she was, and it made me feel guilty that I only told her that I loved her after moving to a different country and not seeing her every week like I used to.
I know for some people- myself included- it can be hard to express our feelings, I have no idea why we have such difficulty talking about how we feel, but that's just something that we will have to work on, so please be careful of how you treat your loved ones so that you won't have a shred of regret when they are no longer in your life.Tell them how much you love them and how much they mean to you, not a daily basis of course but when you feel that they need to hear it.
FIRST COMMENT! Heehee
ReplyDeleteAgree with everything you so beautifully wrote.
The parts about people whom you used to love dearly and become strangers and the not being able to/not knowing how to express yourself really resounded with me. I think we also mirror our parents behaviors'in a sense. Ya3ny, I have no doubt that my parents love me and I can feel it, but we are not the "expressive" type. I once had a very very interesting talk with mama about this when I was still a teenager. I was complaining about how non-expressive she was when she handed me a gift, so I told her I don't need gifts, I'd rather have her. She then replied with one of the most statements that has shaped my life. She said that if someone doesn't love you the way you like/want, it doesn't mean that they don't love you in their own way. And it's so true. We sometimes are only able to see the signs that we think are love, when love is as diverse as the shades of blue in the sky right before sunset. There's so much of it that overlaps and other aspects are so distinct.
Waiting for the next one ;)
N
x x x
I loved it Mashallah
ReplyDeleteVery very true specially the last part
We have to let out our feelings
We have no time we have to say it now not tomorrow
Beautiful moments and beautiful words have to be shared
Love is beautiful and it just nourishes others people's life
And I love you . . You're a good girl
Ya nabilah you should write an article enti kaman ! :D
ReplyDeleteHeehee. Just saw you know that Nadia's talent is not something she's learned. In our family, a girl is born oozing talent! Hahaha
DeleteI think next move Nadia and I can co-write ;) because she's the ideas person.
Lovely day, darling
N
Xxx
So*
DeleteHeehee. Just saw you know that Nadia's talent is not something she's learned. In our family, a girl is born oozing talent! Hahaha
DeleteI think next move Nadia and I can co-write ;) because she's the ideas person.
Lovely day, darling
N
Xxx
I loved it ya noudi, my fav. Piece so far :)
ReplyDelete